Saints and Sinners Sex Party

So, let’s start with some context shall we? The event was the Saints and Sinners Ball, only the single largest sex party held in Australia (hey if you’re going to pop your sex party cherry, go big or go home right?) The theme this particular night was Dirty Disney. I had decided to go as a sexy Cruella Deville, complete with sparkly bra and a Dalmatian suspender belt.

I reached the club and squealed internally as soon as I saw a man walk up to the door wearing a crown. This was it! I noticed a girl looking at me with curiosity and I yelled out to her asking who she was going as. Without a word she unbuttoned her coat and flung it open to reveal a saucy Snow White costume. I gave her a thumbs up and a wink and walked to the back of the line. She gestured to me and pulled me into line with her.

"You don't have to wait all the way back there." she said "Stick with us! We're new to this but our friends have been four times so they're going to show us how it's done!"

"Ok great!" I giggled, practically euphoric with excitement. I shook hands with her Prince Charming and headed inside to get our wristbands put on by a lovely 72-year-old man in leather chaps. He smiled at me and said "Change room is in there." I nodded and proceeded into the adjoining room.

This was not a 'change room' per say. It was a dance floor covered with half naked people ripping off their tawdry day life clothes and transforming themselves into Aladdin's, Pocahontas's and Tiger Lily's. I dove straight in and yanked my shorts off, throwing them into the provided plastic bag with glee. I stepped back so the Big Bad Wolf could get past me and help Red Riding Hood get her shoes on. When I looked to my left I saw pair after pair of the most adorable couples helping each other get changed. There was a couple in their sixties behind me, a pair of girls in their late thirties to my right and a couple who could have been anywhere over their seventies on my other side. By this time I was raring to go. I couldn't wait to see more!

I gave my things to the Mufasa in the coat room and before I knew it Snow White was dragging me upstairs to see more.

We hit the roof top and my eyes couldn't take enough in. It was wall to wall boobs, butt's and bananas.

I made a bee-line for the stage to start my education.

It was fascinating! On the left side of the raised platform stood a woman in her late fifties. She was bent over and had her hands clamped in medieval stocks. Behind her stood the Master, decked out in his leather finery and studded penis cup. As he turned his ass-less chaps blew gently in the breeze. He was in his late sixties, the type of guy you would expect to see at the local pub, having a bet on the races and drinking a beer with your Dad. But not tonight. Tonight he was the whip master, and boy could he wield those things with skill. It was like a dance. In one hand he held a light cat o’ nine tails and in the other he held a much heavier version.

Smack, smack, thwack! Went his whips. Two from the light whip and one with the heavier version. He laid into her entire body with the lighter of the two, getting her blood circulating for the harder, more intense lashes. Rapunzel was bloody loving it. She tapped her toes in their high-heeled fork me boots and smiled widely every time the heavy whip bit into her skin. Rapunzel’s friend’s Pinocchio and Ariel were wolf whistling and cheering her on as her Master drove the whips home.

After taking in my fill of leather, I took a walk down to the second floor and that was where I found one of my favourite places of the night.

"The Grope Box." Yes, it's exactly what it sounds like. Someone stands in a dark box and you stick your hands through the holes and have your way with them.

I had quite a lot of fun tormenting some poor lads in that box. I'd tease them until they were right at the edge and then pull my hand back. The whimpers and moans coming from the box were delightful, as was the fun of dodging their hands as they reached out of the box for me. Small pleasures I guess.

After all the excitement I was growing parched so headed for the bar. As I ordered a beer I noticed something out of the corner of my eye and turned to look into one of the booths to my left. Four people were inside. One woman had her legs spread about as wide as she could get them and the other three were going to town. It was like an all you can eat buffet in that booth! The woman had her hands clasped on the leather cushions, the whites of her knuckles clearly visible. One of her friends came up for a breath and kissed her hard on the mouth, while one of the others decided to take a break and take up residency on her breasts. I was transfixed. This. Was. Awesome.

This night was going to be quite the show. As I looked up, I noticed three men sitting in a row on a bench. Between each of their knees was a girl giving head furiously. These girls weren't messing around and whiplash was a real danger. All the while people around them were chatting, snacking on chips and just generally having a nice time. To my left the Genie was in between Jasmine's legs and boy was Jasmine screaming. In a flash he was up and giving her a good thrashing with his lamp, which she was loving every second of.

I decided it was time to get into the action. I looked to my right and I was confronted with a fascinating sight. One girl, two guys, and she was giving them head at the same time. I wanted to applaud her right then and there but thought better of it, thinking it might throw off her rhythm. I was so mesmerised by her talent that I didn't notice one of the guys watching me until he was tracing his hand along my chin. I looked up, startled out of my reverie. He smiled and asked if I'd like to join the girl currently servicing him. I laughed and told him it looked like she had things well in hand. He asked if I wanted to make out instead.

Why not?

He was definitely a good kisser and I think he enjoyed my technique, although his moaning was probably due much more to what was happening south of his belly button than my kisses. When we unlatched from each other he nodded to a handsome fellow next to him and said,

"Why don't you bend over and kiss him and I'll kiss your ass?"

Keh?

"Uh, you're not going to slip it in are you? Cause I don't want to do anyone at the moment." I said firmly. He assured me he wouldn't, saying it was obvious I was new to this and he would do as much or as little as I wanted. I was so overwhelmed by his kindness I gave him another snog as thanks. After a quick conversation warning him that I was not the rimming type and he should stick firmly to the cheeks, I bent over and pashed handsome stranger man long and hard.

I don't know if you guys have tried this, but having someone kiss you on the butt while you kiss someone else is actually loads of fun!

Even more so when someone else joins in and starts simultaneously playing with handsome man’s balls and flicking my nipples. (I tell you, you really have to be ambidextrous to attend these parties!)

After a few minutes of this, I made my apologies and headed back over to the other side of the room, which was now orgy central.

Absentmindedly I reached for the bowl of chips next to me, unaware I was being watched. As I crunched on my much-needed sustenance, a sixty something lady leaned towards me and asked, "Do you dare?"

I looked at her blankly for a moment, not registering what she meant before realising she was warning me about the potent mix of food and the mass amount of body fluids flying about. Cross contamination was never a more real fear.

After I twigged to her meaning I laughed and replied, "Oh don't worry, I'm so hungry I could eat anything right now."

Bad choice of words at a sex party Claire.

The ladies eyebrows disappeared into her hairline and she quickly scurried away, mumbling something about how I just had to meet her husband.

I beat a hasty retreat and ended up sitting on the edge of the dance floor, soaking in the steamy cloud of sex that now permeated the whole place. It was like a fog had descended, and all those caught underneath it were free to frolic as they pleased. And oh my did they frolic.

I was still caught up in my dirty day-dreams when I noticed a couple beckoning to me from their bean bag. I looked behind me to see if they were gesturing to a friend, but unless the odd-looking lizard man near me was a great mate of theirs, they were calling to me! I slid over to them and smiled shyly. Hercules and Mulan were from New Zealand and were one of the cutest couples I have had the pleasure to meet. I asked them how long they had been together and they chimed “We’re engaged!” with giddy excitement. I squealed as she showed off her engagement ring and congratulations were exchanged.

“We love each other so much and I just love to give him more of what he wants.” Gushed Mulan.

I nodded, awestruck that she could be so comfortable in herself and in her relationship to freely tote her man around at sex parties.

But the time for talking was over as he pulled me down for a kiss. He was a good kisser too, a fact I relayed to Mulan as she busied herself with Hercules balls of steel. She noticed me looking down at her and thought I was checking out her man’s equipment. She pointed to it and grinned.

“You want to have a go?” I quickly shook my head and explained I didn’t want to do anything to cause trouble in their relationship. They both threw back their heads and laughed as if I had just shown them the best cat video over.

“It’s ok.” Mulan assured me, and she pulled me closer and was kissing me as we both massaged Hercules balls. Then it was switcheroo time as she took the top and I took the bottom. I was having quite the nice time down there until suddenly he made a noise.

“Are you alright?” I asked, alarmed that I had accidentally bitten down or something. He laughed and pulled me up to him. They both looked at me expectantly and I knew it was sex time.

“Sorry, I just have to pee. I’ll be right back.” And I jumped up and scurried away to the bathrooms.

I didn’t know what it was, I just suddenly knew I didn’t want to have sex with anyone tonight. Enjoying my short rendezvous with strangers (along with a good session in the grope box) was enough for me tonight.

I tottered up to the second floor to revisit said box but found something even better on the way.

John Smith.

I always thought he was too good for Pocahontas and the same could be said for this delicious specimen. Luckily, I was no Pocahontas. I strolled up to him and without a word we locked lips. It was great! It was fantastic in the fact that it was so different from all other encounters I had had on dancefloors past. There was no fumbling for my breasts in their too tight bra (hey when you have nothing to push up you just have to squeeze em like pimples. It's an art.) It was just good simple kissing. I guess I'm an old romantic but that kiss was truly my favourite part of the night.

When we finally detached from each other, John decided to lead me towards the orgy den, which was as packed as I had ever seen it.

He squeezed himself in between Peter Pan screwing the daylights out of Ariel and Tinkerbell sucking off Bambi. (Seriously, it was Bambi. That was a weird one.)

I knelt down and started doing what I do best. I had only been going for about five minutes when I felt something tickling my back. I looked up to see Esmerelda leaning over me, a small smile on her face as she took all of what Captain Hook had to give her. I shrugged and got back to work, me downstairs, Esmerelda kissing John Smith, whilst being done doggy by that old rascal Captain Hook, who's ass was being spanked by that big blue monster from Monsters Inc. I've heard of multi -asking but this was insane!

Suddenly Esmerelda tapped me on the shoulder and asked,

"Are you going to shag him?" I shook my head and with a smile stepped aside as she saddled up. I gave John a kiss goodbye and headed for the bar. It had all got a little too crowded in there.

As I looked around though I noticed that everywhere else seemed to be getting more and more empty. Was there some secret sex floor I didn't know about? I sank down into a chair, not realizing just how exhausted I was. A burly man who I can only assume was dressed as Beast approached me to get jiggy but I waved him off with the usual pee line. Only this time he replied with "You can pee on me if you like." Ok, time to go. It's not that I begrudged anyone a golden shower or two, but I did feel the deepest of sympathies for the bar staff and anyone unlucky enough to be on clean up duty.

As I dressed I reflected on my amazing experience. While I had been so nervous to begin with, the night was filled with overwhelming kindness, impeccable manners and just a touch of lubricant. Nobody was there to get trashed and start fights. Nobody was there to get so drunk they couldn't stand.

Everybody was there for one reason. Pleasure. Pleasure and fun. And by god did we have some!

So, I have a secret. I take it everywhere with me. It clings to me like an invisible coat I can throw on at any time. And not one of these random passers by will ever know. So remember ladies and gents...

Keep it secret. Keep it safe.

Written by Claire W.